100 Word Challenge Week#17
The Journey
You know I may be dead but finding the stairway to Heaven isn’t easy. So far all I’ve found is wandering spirits on the same quest as me, but every time they’re pulled into the burning depths of Hell, so every time I see a spirit I hide until it leaves.
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Now, after years I now know where the stairway to heaven is. I can't believe, I didn't put two and two together. Here is what the clue said “Heaven is in the place of paradise.” so I need to go to paradise island. Now I can have peace.
It was kinda confusing and I don't think that out can say hell in your story
ReplyDeletethe end did not really make any sense you jumped to conclusion without warning in sense you should add somthing to make the end make a little more sense
ReplyDeleteGood story. But in one sentence you wrote that "Now after years I now know where the stairway to heaven I can't..." First of all in your sentence you said "I now know where the stairway to heaven I"? I think you need to change your sentence to "I now know where the stairway to heaven IS." And when you say "Now after years..." I think you should have a comma after "Now."
ReplyDeleteI was working on it at the exact time you commented.
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DeleteWhere is your title?
ReplyDeleteYou need a comma after you know. I don't think so you might want hell in your story because so grade 3 teachers are going to read your story.
ReplyDeleteIts a place not word because it's a noun
Deletealso should I say firey depths of the Underworld it won't fit.
DeleteAlso your story is bit confusing to me.
ReplyDeleteIm very confused at the end where it says "I didnt put two and two together" Also your story didnt make any sense i think you should read it to your self and clear it up.
ReplyDeleteIt explains it before hand
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